Content warning: In this post I mention my own suicidal thoughts caused by autistic perimenopause. Please seek support for yourself immediately if you are experiencing extreme mental health challenges
‘Unpredictable periods meant I no longer had my “good week” to look forward to, where I would feel on top of the world.’
Yes the good week, PMDD allowed me 7-10 stable days(although back then I didn’t know anything about pmdd)
Now I have the occasional day when the fog lifts, the haze has cleared and I feel like balance might be restored…the next day I’m stuck, mute, in a sort of paralysis state.
Hi Sam, it’s still messy here too! Iv not opened my laptop for almost a month…physically a mess, cognitively a messy mess. Iv managed to get my eating somewhat stable, so of course that is helping, but my digestive system isn’t functioning great and it’s really knocked me sideways!
Sounds awful and I’m pretty much the same way. My digestive system is awful too. I thought I was having a heart attack on Saturday but was too busy to stop for help or reassurance. This is total crap 💩 😭
Wow so good. How great that you have a space for this!!! I had surgical menopause over a year ago and I feel like the hormone monsters have left the building. Never felt so great in my LIFE. But I wonder if I had been perimenopausal or not prior to that. I did receive the lovely diagnosis of PMDD years ago because I was a raging bitch, and that was in my mid-30s. Even with research, I can't get this issue right in my mind; it's confusing to me. Is PMDD and perimenopause the same thing or are there clear differences?
To my knowledge, PMDD (pre-menstrual dysphoria disorder?) is a cyclical issue that occurs usually the week before your period starts and can occur right from puberty to menopause. Perimenopause is the period (excuse the pun) when hormones have greater variation in levels, and it is the surging difference in increases/drops in hormone levels that affect our capacity. It is a shorter time span but can be up to 14 years before our periods stop altogether. Which is an awful thought, because I think I am only six years into peri, and wonder how I will ever survive it! So I love that you feel so great post-menopause, yay!!
Oh I’m so sorry, isn’t it horrendous? Even when I know why it’s happening, it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with. It just means I am hyper vigilant about knowing that suicidal thoughts aren’t my fault and I need to not act on them. Even that can be hard sometimes.
It’s such an enormous difference to the neurotypical rhetoric about identifying this as a time of change and rewriting your script. Here we are trying to keep ourselves on the page and overcome this ordeal 😭
‘Unpredictable periods meant I no longer had my “good week” to look forward to, where I would feel on top of the world.’
Yes the good week, PMDD allowed me 7-10 stable days(although back then I didn’t know anything about pmdd)
Now I have the occasional day when the fog lifts, the haze has cleared and I feel like balance might be restored…the next day I’m stuck, mute, in a sort of paralysis state.
How are you feeling now, Nicola? I am still a mess. I need more good days/weeks!
Hi Sam, it’s still messy here too! Iv not opened my laptop for almost a month…physically a mess, cognitively a messy mess. Iv managed to get my eating somewhat stable, so of course that is helping, but my digestive system isn’t functioning great and it’s really knocked me sideways!
Sounds awful and I’m pretty much the same way. My digestive system is awful too. I thought I was having a heart attack on Saturday but was too busy to stop for help or reassurance. This is total crap 💩 😭
Wow so good. How great that you have a space for this!!! I had surgical menopause over a year ago and I feel like the hormone monsters have left the building. Never felt so great in my LIFE. But I wonder if I had been perimenopausal or not prior to that. I did receive the lovely diagnosis of PMDD years ago because I was a raging bitch, and that was in my mid-30s. Even with research, I can't get this issue right in my mind; it's confusing to me. Is PMDD and perimenopause the same thing or are there clear differences?
Hello :)
To my knowledge, PMDD (pre-menstrual dysphoria disorder?) is a cyclical issue that occurs usually the week before your period starts and can occur right from puberty to menopause. Perimenopause is the period (excuse the pun) when hormones have greater variation in levels, and it is the surging difference in increases/drops in hormone levels that affect our capacity. It is a shorter time span but can be up to 14 years before our periods stop altogether. Which is an awful thought, because I think I am only six years into peri, and wonder how I will ever survive it! So I love that you feel so great post-menopause, yay!!
Oh thank you so much for differentiating that for me! That explanation makes total sense to me :)
Oh it’s so awful watching history play out again when it’s not as positive as it could be 😭
Oh I’m so sorry, isn’t it horrendous? Even when I know why it’s happening, it doesn’t make it any easier to deal with. It just means I am hyper vigilant about knowing that suicidal thoughts aren’t my fault and I need to not act on them. Even that can be hard sometimes.
It’s such an enormous difference to the neurotypical rhetoric about identifying this as a time of change and rewriting your script. Here we are trying to keep ourselves on the page and overcome this ordeal 😭